At Your Disposal

I've never had confidence issues. I've never had any reason to doubt myself, or a reason to make me think I’m anything less than beautiful.

But then you came along. 

You made me believe I was something special, and for those few weeks I truly felt like it. And when you left, you didn't just take our memories and our story that was only in the prologue.  You took along my confidence, my self-assurance, and any hope I had that love could ever exist between two people.

I was a tall standing redwood and you chopped me down, cutting my branches of life into little pieces that you used to kindle the next fire you start in another girl’s heart.  My love was at your disposal, and you washed me down the drain to flow among the tears that ran down my face. 

Every word that you say is another bitter reminder that I am no longer your She, and you are no longer my He. I wanted so badly to go back and figure out what I did wrong, so maybe I could fix the broken shell of my heart. I had built up a wall so sturdy, so strong, and you had bulldozed right through it with your smile. 

One day, I may forgive you for the pain you have caused me. But I will never forget.